Desert Coach

  "Sweetheart, do you think Holly is putting on weight?" THIRD CUP OF COFFEE Our cats, for the most part, have been trim, agile, fairly small, and well groomed. Cats are fastidious and they don't for the most part like not looking their best. They are, each in her own way, divas. Cats like to keep themselves and their territory in good order. They spend a lot of time grooming themselves and demand clean litter boxes. If the box is not clean, out they come! Cats are truly amazing when it comes to personal hygiene. Whereas it takes a child a couple of years to get potty trained cats have bathroom habits down immediately. No changing diapers. No constant reminders that it is time for a change. Cats, just like us, come with their own physique. Over the years my wife and I have lived with several cats that can only be described as chubby, well fed, or frankly overweight. Holly, who lives with us now, is in this category without question. Even when on weight management regimen

  "You know, sweetheart, cats sure can be quite the talkers!" SECOND CUP OF COFFEE Cats are much like people. They all have their distinct personalities and no two are the same.  Some cats are loners and would just as well never see another cat in the house. In fact, Smokey, who has lived with my wife and I for many years still is not chummy with two other cats in our household. Oh, she tolerates them but that it is about it. She clearly feels that even after all the years she is the greyish blue Siamese Queen. Cats know by instinct the ranking order. Make no doubt about it in our home Smokey is numero uno. Our other two cats, Bella and Holly, do the smart thing and give Smokey right of way. Whether it is feeding time or bed time they know to let Smokey prance in first and be petted and attended to. First to treats, first to grooming, and when it comes to the condos the penthouse suite. My wife and Smokey have an enduring bond. Smokey comes to bed at night and makes a beeline

  "Sweetheart, what is it about catnip that makes Yum Yum so crazy?" FIRST CUP OF COFFEE Leonard Cohen, the great poet of the soul, once gave a litany of all the drugs he had used and experimented on over the years in searching for the elixir of love and freedom from a tormented mind. It was quite a list and included Prozac along with a bunch of others to fill the cabinet of a highly creative seeker of life's mysteries. After years of experimentation he poetically announced, "There ain't no cure for love." Life distilled is "dum, dee, dum, dee, dum." Now our cats don't get quite the selection of Cohen.  They get catnip. It is our choice for them and quite benign. It just has the pleasant effect of making some of them go crazy. Not all. You see some cats could care less about catnip. Kind of like a person who tries marijuana and says it has no effect on them. "I tried it once and don't see what all the hype is about..." With many o

  "Sweetheart, cats sure rule! We need to add on to our home!" THIRD CUP OF COFFEE Cats rule! My wife and I figured this out very early on. When we got our first cat we got her a bowl and a bed. A little later on we brought home a cool cat condo for her. As she got older and had a weight issue we got her special weight management food. Then when she had a problem with incontinence a different blend of food for that issue. Over time our home became more and more like a day and night care center for seniors! When we got a second cat, a second condo. When we had three cats at one time, three condos. After all,  we surmised, they each need their own space, or should I say personal condo. Not to say that they didn't have the run of the entire house. As I said earlier, we had already realized the true owners of our home. At one point two of our cats had real issues. Boogie was suffering from diabetes and needed shots in the morning and evening. Sonny was having bouts of inconti

  "Sweetheart, we sure have had some unique cats." SECOND CUP OF COFFEE This is another way of saying that we live or have lived with some really exceptional cats! If you have had no training or experience in psychology, especially erratic and unpredictable behavior, this is a great way to get it. All cats exhibit their own unique brand of independence and habits. You get your first clue to this when they are kittens and will shoot high in the air for apparently no reason, run through the house at break neck speed after nothing or everything, and act as hyper-active as the worst kid you have ever known. Somehow, very early on, cats take on their own peculiar traits, or what might be described in more psychological language as almost compulsive disorders or even fetishes. A couple of examples came to our mind right away. Bella, from the age of a kitten, has always been a "slammer." In the middle of the night you will hear a thud up next to the bed. This is Bella slam

  "Sweetheart, we sure have learned some things from our cats!" FIRST CUP OF COFFEE To say or think that you own a cat is a total misnomer. They will let you believe that but only when it is to their benefit, and even then, only occasionally. "Yes, you own me. So it is ok to feed me every day. In addition, you can make available the entire house for me to roam, sleep, stalk, hang out, get high on catnip, and perform disappearing acts." "Don't be alarmed when you can't find me. After all I am a house cat. I am in the house. I will come out and make an appearance when I feel like it." Get the picture? My wife and I found out very early on that we don't own the cat. The cat owns us! This is a universal truth. Even the most docile cat, the one who never flashes a paw or claws at anything can suddenly become truant and disappear to the point of frantic concern. "Where is she?" "Where did you last see her?" "I just petted her

FOURTH CUP OF COFFEE "I guess it happens to all of us. But it sure doesn't make it any easier." Sometimes daily happy routine and events go on so long you think it will always be that way. But it never is. Barring accident or disease you expect to see your feline friend every day lounging in the same places, lumped up in bed as usual, and waiting at the feed bowl for breakfast, brunch, lunch, and supper as usual. You don't expect them not to show up at the usual times or to slow down. You don't expect their fur to take on a tinge of gray. You don't expect them to have incontinence problems in the middle of the day or night or on the dining room floor. It happens to us. So why not them. And so it was with our beloved Yum Yum. After eighteen years of perky joy and friendship she slowed down and then one day she died. We often say someone has "passed away" but I don't really like the expression when it comes to close friends or family. Our cats are

THIRD CUP OF COFFEE "So many great memories of her. I can't remember a bad day!" That is the way it is with cats. By nature they are tidy and fastidious. They seldom mess up. When they do it is usually no more serious than a little hairball spit up or a little love bite because you petted them too much or just rubbed them the wrong way at the moment. Nothing very serious. And you have to be a little thankful. After all, you have a kind of miniature version of a large jungle cat in the house. You have to accept some stalking of the terrain and an occasional tendency to the attack mode. Daytime is for the most part safe and sound. There is a lot of sleeping going on. It is night time when dark eyes peering out from somewhere in the darkness or a sense of lurking around might unsettle a bit. With Yum Yum the telltale warning was always the eyes. Normally big and bright when she was not pleased her eyes would become very narrow and squinty. Good idea then to stay clear and to

SECOND CUP OF COFFEE "Sweetheart, remember how we first met Yum Yum?" We decided to got the restaurant up the street and have lunch. We wondered if the place would still be in business since the location had changed hands so often. In a mainly retirement community it is hart for a place to stay in business. The waitresses always complain about too little tips and most people go to the fast food locations for breakfast. But they were open. We had lunch an then went outside to leave in our vehicle. That is when you first saw her. There she was under a parked car and she came over by your feet and let out a meow and let you pick her up. She cuddled up to your neck and purred while you held her. I got ready to start the car and leave. I looked over and could see that her fur was sooty with dust and grime and that she was not much to look at. You could barely tell that she was black with white on parts of her face over her left eye and left side of her cheek. Remember that I was i

  "Sweetheart, I sure do miss her!" FIRST CUP OF COFFEE These were my first words this morning over coffee with my wife. Strong storm that was when my wife and I first met. She full blooded Sicilian heritage from New York and me of Scottish and English heritage from Canada. Me conservative, frugal and calm about most things. Her full of opinion and a temper that can boil over faster than the hottest coffee! But on one thing we always agree. We both love cats. Each one hold a very special place in our lives and have for many years. In fact, once our boys were grown we cannot remember a time when our home has not been filled with the love and presence of at least one feline friend. Many of our cats have lived with us for years and years. Each one is special. Each one has those little endearing traits that bring joy and laughter to an otherwise possibly dull and routine day. Though cats love routine they break up the monotony in many surprising ways. They are paradox creatures.

  I made a movie once. Director I. It was in black and white. It was a love scene. Pan in on the eyes, the eyes, Such a beautiful watery hue. Now move to their faces, Locking eyes, No dialogue, Just his hand moving to her face. Now don't miss it His other hand coming Up the other side. Her face held gently now. Hold steady, hold steady, In a quiet moment they are ready, Eyes closed. A kiss. Linger with them In that kiss. Now catch their eyes this time When they harder embrace. Now pan back As they unembrace. Pan the doorway slowly As he slowly move that way. Don't miss his face As he steady looks, Back at her, And goes out the door.

  Webster dictionary defines the word "agenda" as the underlying motivation, plan, or intentions of an individual or group.  With a clear agenda everyone can basically know what an individual or company stands for.  You know the score so to speak. Now, what about when the agenda is hidden? What about the truly secret plan behind all the words, words, words. Whether in business, politics, religion or other areas so much of what is out there is really smoke and mirrors when it comes to real intentions, real motivations. In English we say, "Do not believe everything that you hear!" Especially today when we are bombarded from every source about intentions and motivations this is a reminder to oftentimes beware the messenger and drill down a little deeper into what is REALLY going on. Spies are notorious for having hidden agendas. Beware! They are not the only ones!

  Listening to the Presidential debate the other night I was reminded of comments made by James in the Bible about speaking and communicating.  What I love about James is how he is so straight forward and does not mince words. He clearly states, "But no man can tame the tongue. It an unruly evil, full of deadly poison." James 2:8(NKJV). It seems to me that the spewing of poison has become almost a national norm. What seems to be a "new normal" is just to rant and rave and say whatever comes to mind with absolutely NO FILTER as to the value or truth of what is being said. When I was growing up I heard things like "watch your mouth" and "think before you speak." Not to think before speaking was tagged mouthing off. Today the attitude is to let go with whatever is on your mind without any thought to its consequences. Today there is a huge green light to just unload opinions and words no matter how hurtful or disrespectful to others. There was the so